What Is Emotional Intelligence? And Do You Have It?

Everyone knows at least vaguely about general intelligence, or IQ, but what about emotional intelligence, or EQ? For the vast majority of us, emotional intelligence is more important to our lives than IQ. Harvard theorist Howard Gardner explains, "Your EQ [or emotional intelligence] is the level of your ability to understand other people, what motivates them, and how to work cooperatively with them." Today, our success among our peers and in our careers depends on our ability to interpret the signals from the people around us, and to react appropriately.

Emotional intelligence can be broken into five main categories that every individual should attempt to master.

Self-Awareness: Before a person can read another person's emotions, they should be able to read their own. Self-awareness requires an individual to be aware of his or her own emotions, and be able to manage them. For example, a self-aware individual who finds himself fidgeting may recognize that they are nervous and begin to take steps to calm himself down. This self-awareness also encompasses self-confidence, which is always helpful when negotiating your way through interpersonal communication.

Self-Regulation: While no one will have complete control over the emotions that they experience, some can control how long these emotions last. Self-regulation is the ability to alleviate negative emotions such as anger or anxiety; the individual is able to take a breath, and review his or her situation in a more positive light. People who have mastered self-regulation are able to control any negative impulses, have personal standards of integrity, take responsibility for their actions, and are able to adapt to new situations.

Motivation: An emotionally intelligent individual will have personal goals, and be able to recognize that others also have their own goals. The achieve any of these, a person needs to be motivated to improve himself, ready to take advantage of opportunities, and optimistic. A person with a high emotional intelligence will be able to balance his own goals with the goals of organizations that he is involved with; this can include the workplace, volunteer organization, and even friend circles.

Empathy: This is the ability to discern the feelings or motivations behind another person's signals; this will also determine which signals you need to send them in return. An empathetic person will be able to anticipate another's needs, be able to bolster the abilities of their co-works, read a person or group's emotional state, and understand the power dynamic in relationships or groups.

Social Skills: A well-developed set of interpersonal skills is important to success in both personal relationships and a career. People with good social skills are able to persuade others, send clear messages, guide others, manage change, resolve disagreements, and build bonds with others.

Of course, not everyone will have an inherently high EQ. The aspects and skills that make up a high emotional intelligence, however, can be learned. Every person can learn to recognize and regulate their emotions, and to react appropriately in group dynamics. The process often requires not only interaction with others, but self-reflection. As you learn how to read yourself, and control your own negative emotions, you will naturally become better at reading the people around you, and responding to their signals, and navigating the waters of any social situation!

Nancy Travers, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker, specializes in all types of relationships; dating, existing relationships, family relationships, and relationships with friends and business relationships. She also helps her clients overcome anxiety and depression through talk therapy as well as through hypnosis. What sets her apart from many other counselors is that she has counseled in the gay/lesbian community for over 10 years. She also has experience counseling families with elder care issues. Nancy has been in practice for over 15 years and can provide you with the tools you need to approach dating and relationships with confidence. Visit her website at http://www.nancyscounselingcorner.com.

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Subliminal Messaging And The Subconscious World

Subliminal messaging is everywhere. Our perceptive capacities are far beyond our conscious mind abilities, therefore, an enormous number of outside information is constantly captured by us without our own or conscious knowledge. That doesn´t mean although, that we lose all that information. It is a matter of fact that it remains inside of us on a subconscious level and it will, sooner or later, influence our thoughts, decisions or beliefs in a way or another.

I consider subliminal messaging as a subtle kind of language that overcomes our conscience and riches our subconscious level directly.

No one can honestly deny that there is a hidden and profound part of us, constantly operating on auto-pilot, that dictates our conscious world or, at least, strongly influences it.

Despite being a very discussed theme, the subconscious mind subject seems to intimidate a lot of us and some prefer to pay more attention to the easier-to-understand conscious side of their psyche, remaining in a "comfort zone", trying to ignore the unavoidable fact that it plays an important role in what and who we are.

There is no way we can avoid it playing out repetitive patterns despite our conscious objections. It can give us confusing or illuminating dreams; it drives our overriding behavior and it speaks loudly through habits and the language of symbols. Although being submerged in shadow, subconscious mind is a reality and we certainly have a lot to lose when trying to ignore it instead of trying to know it better and better, in order to develop ourselves by a deeper knowledge of our inner "secrets".

There is an image often used to describe our mind that I consider very explicit. That is the well-known image of an iceberg. We only see the "tip of the iceberg" but we know there is a much larger part of it under the waterline. This image is, in my opinion, the best one to explain the sizes of our conscious and subconscious minds.

The reality is that our conscious only takes 10% of our mind's system, being the other 90% our subconscious. That is so, because it is in our subconscious that all our memories are stored. Notice, although, that I am not only referring to those countless events that occur during our life experience about which a great part of them our conscious mind is not even aware of, but also, in a much deeper perspective, I am referring to our racial memories (Human race, not national or skin-colour race), common histories and shared symbols. I could even go further and speak about our organs and its managing which is also a task performed on a subconscious level.

It has long been proven, that most of the times we act upon emotions which are preceded by thoughts and that the thoughts stand out strongly, not to say totally, influenced by our beliefs or "inner pictures" which generate them.

Balance is a natural and essential requisite for any human being to be healthy, successful and happy. Therefore, we all have a natural and mental inside mechanism constantly striving to align our beliefs (or inner self) with our conscious reality. That mental mechanism is no more than our subconscious mind and it works so effectively and in such an automatic way, that we don´t even get to realize it. The fact is, although, that the larger the difference between our inner picture and our conscious reality, the harder our subconscious will work to bring them to alignment.

Being so, we can now understand that there is nothing wrong with subliminal messaging and, on contrary, using it properly can be very useful.
Let me explain:

Your inner image of yourself and your deep beliefs is a determining factor in all your failure as well as success. It is very unlikely that you achieve any improvement in your life if what you are seeking is not consistent with your current inner picture. That is why positive affirmations don´t work so effectively if proclaimed in a conscious level, as most of the time they don´t reach that "inner you".

Your inner beliefs aren´t always a reflection of the absolute truth. The fact that they are "beliefs" doesn't mean that they are right and in a fair correspondence with reality. So, if there was a way to correct them in order to achieve the right balance, it would be great.

Well, there is an old way commonly recognized to be very effective on the correction of our beliefs - hypnotism.

The problem with it, however, is that when you submit yourself to a hypnotic session you cannot do anything else at the same time. That means that you have got to have time to do it and that you can hardly do it alone.

There is although, a rather effective way to directly reach your subconscious and "work yourself" without having to compromise your daily tasks. That is a valuable instrument called "audio subliminal messages". Using your MP3, you can listen to music or any other perceptive sound (nature sounds are very common) with imbibed subliminal messages, while you work or perform almost any other tasks (not recommended while driving).

This method has been increasing as people´s preferred choice on personal development and it is commonly referred as "subliminal audio messaging self development method".

We will be talking about how it is technically conceived soon in another article. See you then.

MBM has a Master degree on Social Sciences. If you would like to know more about subliminal messaging or you can go and visit his blog

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An Introduction to Ego States.

Transactional Analysis and Ego States

Transactional Analysis is first and foremost a therapeutic tool for positive change and growth. It can be used either in therapy for the individual concerned or on a more surface level for problem solving in everyday life.

TA is basically the study of how people take on certain behaviors, either by accident or from their early caretakers or authority figures and then continue to play them out in their adult lives. It is a model for people to use to work towards 'autonomy', a place from where they can choose to live the way they want to and not to be still acting as if they are controlled by past events or messages.

Transactional Analysis then is a modern psychotherapy model, which has; it's own particular language and theory of personality. It states that the person transacts with a person in certain ways, structures their time between life and death in a particular way, plays their own particular games and lives out their own unique script.

An understanding of Transactional Analysis can give hope for the person in that they can change their script and choose the way they want to re-write their own life plan, without hanging on to inappropriate behaviors of the past.

The creator of Transactional Analysis Was Eric Berne, a Psychiatrist and a man who was largely influenced by Freud,though by the time of his death in 1970,he had become a,in some ways, a critic of Freud. Transactional Analysis though does have its roots in Psycho dynamic theory.

The personality for Transactional Analysis, for Berne, is based on the recognition of three quite different ego states, called specifically the Parent, Adult and Child.

An ego state for Berne is:

'a system of feelings accompanied by related set of behaviour patterns.'

For example, spontaneous feelings, compliance and rebellion are all features of the child ego state and may be activated by the individual at any time throughout his life.

Berne recognised that three such ego states must be in everyone and that together they make up the unique individuals Personality.

For Berne the ego states are not roles but are phenomenological realities.

Each ego state is concerned with what actually happened in the past for that person and how they acted will determine how they act in the here and now. The decisions that they made then will determine the decisions and behaviours they now make in the present.

The Parent Ego State

(Case Study One)

Bob was the leader of his group of friends and it was he who always set the time that they should meet, where they should go and what they 'should do'. He often shook his finger at his friends reprovingly. People in his circle of friends eventually got fed up of him and many left the group.

(Case Study Two)

Mary and Joan were good friends and they went everywhere together. When Joan's mother died it was Mary who looked after her and often put her arm around Joan saying such words as 'Don't worry about things. I will help you with all your work; I love you a lot you know'.

The above then, are examples of a controlling parent behaviour and a nurturing parent behaviour,of the Parent Ego state

The Parent Ego State

The parent ego state contains the attitudes and behaviours that are observed and copied from the individual's caretakers and figures. In other words the spoken and unspoken rules. The "shoulds' and the 'oughts" of life. The individual's early parent is formed in the child from birth to approx five years and in Transactional Analysis terms is called the parent in the child or the P1. The complete parent ego state or the P2 is formed between the ages of five years to approx twenty years as a result of even more external stimuli from their authority of caretaker figures.

When the P2 is activated in later life, the person will be acting in the ways that their authority figures will have acted, indeed this is the model that the individual will have incorporated into his own parent, though it must be noted that each individual will have a different parent ego state and will act in their own unique way.

The Adult Ego State

(Case Study Two)

James decided to go and see his aunt who lived in the next town - as he had never left his town before, he had to get his map out to work out how he would get there - this he did successfully and he got to his aunt's house at the time he said he would. Thus we can see that James used his adult ego state to work out logically, given the facts, how to solve a given problem.

The Adult Ego State emerges around six months in the child and is concerned primarily with appraising facts, reasoning, thinking, evaluating and responding to available data.

It is described by many Transactional Analysis writers like a computer, concerned only with rationality and logic.

However, I think this position is some what misleading and I prefer Berne's commentary, which describes that adult as coming from an integrated stance which does not mean that when the person activates their adult ego state he is coming from just a rational position, but that he also has access to feelings, thinking and attitudes. Indeed the person will be part of the 'here and now' and experiencing and coming from an integrated adult stance.

The Child Ego State

(Case Study One)

When john's mother died when he was three years old, he was too young to really understand what had happened, he just felt hurt that his mother had gone away. When he was fifteen years of age, John had a hard time trusting women - he often complained that women left him and let him down a lot when he most needed them. Other people felt that women were really good to him and helped him a lot.

(Case Study Two)

Fiona when a small girl could get her father to do anything she really wanted. Indeed as she grew up she was very good at managing to get men to do what she wanted. Later, she was fired from several jobs by her bosses who said they felt she was manipulating them.

(Case Study Three)

As a child, Freda's parents argued a lot and her major method of defense was to withdraw and spend a lot of time alone going for long walks. At eighteen she got sacked from many jobs for daydreaming and fantasizing. In her personal life, she would withdraw mentally if her friends argued with her. They got fed up with her and left.

People who spend a lot of time operating from a child ego state usually are acting as they did when they were a child. For example, Freda lost a lot of jobs because she daydreamed when she should have been concentrating on her work. Fiona attempted to manipulate men in her life with the expectation that she would get what she wanted as she had from her father when a child.

Being in your child ego state does not mean that you are being childish. It simply means that you are acting out as you did when you were a child.

The Child Ego State

The Child Ego State is primarily concerned with feelings though that does not mean that when in the 'here and now' experience the person does not have access to attitudes and thinking, but it simply means that when activated feelings are usually the executive energy force.

The child ego state is the part of the personality, which is preserved from actual childhood; it also contains all the impulses a person was born with. The child ego state is, as said above, primarily about spontaneous feelings, needs and wants of the child. It is also important to note that the child ego state contains 'recordings' of childhood memories and experiences. Therefore, when the person feels and acts as they did when they were very young, they are experiencing their child ego state.

The personality can be subdivided further into the Nurturing and Controlling parent and the Free and Adapted child. An example of the nurturing side of the parent ego state would be the person who lovingly takes care of the dog who go injured whilst crossing the road. An example of the controlling parent being activated would be in the person who might say 'all dogs should be kept on leads and not allowed to roam free' and do nothing to look after the injured dog. From this particular example we can see how the same ego state can act in different ways according to person's past messages.

An example of the difference between the free and adapted child ego state would be for example, the person who complies to almost anything and perhaps may automatically say 'thank you' whilst repressing other feelings as opposed to the free child stance of free and spontaneous feelings, according to the situation. The free child is naturally inquisitive, curious and often does act without thinking of the consequences.

Another stance of the adapted child position is one of pseudo-rebellion. In other words, an aware adaptation to a particular situation is the flip child of the compliant child stance.

Again I think it is important to mention here that different people will respond differently to situations and thus different ego states will be activated according to their past messages in life. But, almost certainly, most people will have access to all parts of their personality if they wish, though according to their particular pathology, certain ego states may well dominate their personality in may situations of their lives.

Structural Pathology

This is the part of TA theory that deals with when we get, "stuck" in one Ego State or part of the Self.

The Two major parts of Structural Pathology are Contaminations and Exclusions.

Contamination's between the different parts of the personality or ego states simply means that two ego states overlap or distort so that the person often feels he cannot keep the different ego states separate from each other.

He will often describe a 'stuck' feeling within his personality. A lot of work in Transactional Analysis is around alleviating this 'stuck' sensation or de-contamination, as it is known. An example of a child/adult contamination from a child stance would be a person stating,

'If I believe my mother is not dead for long enough, she will not be'

Or

'If I wear my lucky medallion, I am bound to pass my exams without even revising.'

In other words, in these statements, there is obviously a distortion of adult reality from the child's perspective. It is then necessary to cathart the adult. Contamination can also occur between parent and adult and often does; you may even diagnose double contamination between parent and adult and the child and adult ego states.

Contamination whether from a dominant parent or a dominant child ego state will lead to a dysfunctional ego structure and the person will stay in the unreal position for him or her. This may provide a certain degree of security for the person as it will be familiar to them, but it will also inhibit the real potential for positive change in their life. What the person needs to be able to do is to have access to all ego states and also be able to redistribute his energy evenly in all of them.

An example of a parent/child contamination would be when a person uses such statements as 'coloured people are inferior to white people' and 'boys are cleverer than girls'.

These examples are obviously prejudiced and occur when the person acts or behaves as though something he believes in is the absolute truth and valid for all time. It often comes directly from their own authority figures and is not necessarily true, thus the person, instead of moving to check out the belief by using his adult ego state instead takes it straight on board into his own parent.

Identifying the different Ego States of the Self.

So far, I have described the structure and function of the different units of the personality and how you might be aware of which part you may be operating from in you life experiences. To enable you to identify even more specifically which ego state you are coming from in a specific situation, there are certain clues, which will help you. There are many 'behaviours 'which are typical of each ego state.

Your Child Ego State

When coming from a Child Ego State, your tone may be one of laughing, screaming, angry, rebellious, whining, helpless, stubborn or playful. Your words may be 'wow! I love you. Brill. I hate you. Ace. Amazing. Incredible, I never do it right. Sorry!

Your Critical Parent Ego State

Your tone of voice may be harsh, strong, self-righteous, critical, ordering, dogmatic, uncompromising, overbearing. The posture here will likely be upright, hands on hips, wagging finger, head upright, invasive, erect. The words could be - lots of "woulds, Shoulds" disappointed in you, upset by your behaviour, eat all your food, children should be seen and not heard, don't be late, stupid, when are you going to do........, why have you not..........

Your Adult Ego State

The tone of voice may be measured, clear, precise, crisp, rational, logical. Words may well be very factual. 'I see you are well, how long is it to London, what time is it, it is a fact it is cold today!

All the above words and behaviours, will then give you some clue as to what ego state that person is operating from and thus what you can do to change the situation for yourself. However, it must be remembered that these are only some of the clues for exact ego analysis, you will need more evidence or information for a positive and accurate diagnosis. You may need to ask more historical questions and certainly, you will need to see the person in the 'here and now' to be certain of you analysis.

The Egogram in TA theory

To talk about the ego structure and not to mention the innovation of the Egogram by Jack Dusay in the early 1970s would be a disservice in my opinion to Transactional Analysis. An Egogram is simply defined as:

'a bar graph showing the relationship of the parts of the personality to each other and the amount of psychological energy emanating outward.'

The Egogram is a bar graph showing the amount of energy within the ego structure of the person and how he will re-distribute his energy within the different egos at one given time. Thus the most important aspect for the use of the Egogram in modern psychotherapy is that, it gives an evaluation of the distribution of energy in the personality, and it can be used by the individual to show how much energy is needed to be re-distributed to other parts of the personality to make positive change. It is simple to construct and use, for example, firstly, draw a horizontal line on a piece of paper. Underneath, label the five ego states - adapted child, free child, adult, controlling parent and nurturing parent.

Think of yourself at this particular time or at a specific moment in the past, draw whatever you feel is the most energised part of your personality, and draw it with a vertical line. (This will be your highest column.)

Now, using your intuition, draw the lowest energised part of your personality as it is in comparison with the other. (This will be the lowest column.)

Then fill in the other states as you see them in comparison with the above.

Having done the exercise, you should have now an egogram of the distribution of your energy within your personality at a given time. This will help you see where you might need at certain times to re-distribute your energy to help solve problems in life or therapy.

At this point it is important to mention the constancy hypothesis. As John Dusay suggests in his book on Egograms, when the energy in one Ego state increases, the energy in another Ego state decreases, which means that one can successfully distribute one's energy from one Ego state to another. Indeed, having used Egograms successfully in my own self-evaluation whilst in therapy, and with my own clients within my practice, I have come to the conclusion' that the creation of the Egogram by Dusay has been invaluable to modern psychotherapy and especially Transactional Analysis. Certainly, it shows graphically, the kind of person you are and will show you the way you can positively change to be the person that you want to be in your life.

Bob Cooke TSTA is the founder of The Manchester Institute For Psychotherapy England We provide Psychotherapy and Counselling. We also run comprehensive Psychotherapy, Counselling, and Supervision trainings.As well as the above we run a vibrant CPD program. http://www.mcpt.co.uk Or call 01618629456

Two Ways to Say More Without Speaking

How can you say more without speaking? It is something that most of us do most of the time. The ability to say more without speaking has been one of the key communication channels in use. So how can a person say more without speaking? Is it possible to communicate without speaking? Well strangely enough it is something that most people do all the time, but may not be aware of it. So how can we communicate without speaking?

If you have looked at a group of birds flying in the sky in perfect formation, have you wondered how they do it? Consider the ants who seemed to be cut off from the others, but some how the others are aware of its presence. Is there more to the universe than what we see with our two natural eyes? What are the keys to these mysteries. Let us look more closely at some of these questions and see if we can discover the answers to some of these interesting questions.

Speaking without a word

Communication happens all the time whether we know we are communicating or not. And the fact that we may not say a word does not mean that we are not communicating. This is an art the we seem to develop as we grow, but we do communicate with out speaking. If you consider on a microscopic level, when someone has a cut on a finger how does the body communicate to start the repair of the body? Well to look at one question, communication happens by what we call body language. The way we move our body the expression of our face these all convey how we are feeling. That is why you can tell if a person is angry without a word being spoken. So we often reveal how we are feeling without a word being spoken. Another way that we communicate is by the tone of our voice, we can indicate a great deal by the tone, one tone can say I am bored while another can say I am very happy. Think about it now think of how you look when you are happy, think about the expression of your face. Think about the position of your body when you are feeling great.

Communication Mind to Mind

Do we communicate mind to mind, for example when we look at a group of birds flying in perfect formation, could they be communicating mind to mind. Have you ever felt that someone was looking at you or when walking along the street feel that you could say hello to one person and not another. Is there some kind of mind communicate in action here? There has been talk that we have a sixth sense or a psychic sense. Could it be the case that we all communicate in a psychic way even through we may not all be aware of it? Do we all have the capacity to communicate in a psychic way? Their was a man who had a near death experience and following the experience says that he feels we are all psychic even through we may not seem to be aware of it.

So the next time you make an expression on your face, think about what am I communicating. Thoughts to make you think.

MGA Brown (C) July 2011

http://www.toolsofsuccess.co.uk/

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Neurobiology and Speed Learning for Kids

Educators want nothing else than to make learning easy for kids. So do parents. Speed learning for kids is actually a God-send for most teachers and parents and it is not hard to understand why.

More and more, science is becoming important in the world of education. The best way to learn and to teach is to understand first how we learn and how we should teach.

The way that a person interacts with another is a very big factor in speed learning for kids. There are many concepts in speed learning for kids that parents must understand to make sure that their kids get the best education possible.

Start Early

The infant brain develops rapidly from the moment it is conceived in the womb until the first seven years of life. But it grows the most and the fastest during the first three years.

According to the book, "The Secret Life of the Unborn Child" that was written by Dr, Thomas Verny, MD., even fetuses can see, hear, experience and learn in the uterus.

This scientific breakthrough is especially useful in this kind of learning for kids because this just proves that it is never too early to teach your kids. You don't have to worry that your kids are too young for these lessons.

Associate Things

Another thing that not many people know about the human brain is that kids have highly photographic memory. They would associate one new thing to another thing that's already embedded in their minds.

Association is actually a technique that has been used to further develop a kid's photographic memory. More importantly, it can help make sure that they don't lose that type of ability to remember.

Continuous Development

Speed learning for kids teaches young children to enjoy the process of learning. This is the number one thing that your children needs to develop to make sure that they will get the most out of everything as they grow up.

Now, a neurobiologist from the University of Chicago said that the human brain grows and develops at an incredibly fast rate. And as the growth happens, so does the regeneration of brain cells.

Our interest in learning may or may not change but our ability to process and remember is decreasing as we grow older.

But if your kids take speed learning for kids' lessons, they wouldn't be affected by this neurobiological change as much.

Learn some ways of Speed Learning For Kids by visiting my Speed Learning For Kids website at http://www.superspeedlearning.com/forkids/.

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How Brain Wave Mp3 Can Change Your Life!

Brain wave mp3s are here to stay, they have been researched for over a 150 years. The human brain has many frequency cycles every day, and they all producing different effects in the human consciousness. From this information, it has been discovered that the operating frequency of the brain can be altered and even controlled through the use of sound waves.

High frequency brain wave mp3 recordings you can use to better your life. After all,you spend time at work, watching television, reading the paper, going to have a fun time. Would it now be worth it to enhance your mind power to achieve greater heights?

Just think about think about it, anything thought in the mind is more powerful than what exist in the real world as we see it. Any new invention is first a thought in someone's mind. Mind power is something that can be harnessed by using brain wave mp3 recordings.

If what happens outside is a result of what you feed to your mind, does it not then mean that harnessing of the mind power will tremendously improve your success skills. You may question whether you can really get help though these recordings. I have tried them myself and have improved my life in many way with them. You can use these recordings anytime of the day to visualize anything you can imagine how you can achieved your goals beyond your wildest dreams. To find happiness, and peace of mind. This feeding of the mind with mp3 mindwave recording will get you off on a positive not.

This is easier than you might think, think of the times that you have been day dreaming. Have you imagined being Rich, going on a vacation, getting that new home, or being happy and feeling wonderful?

Think of the result! How happy you are when you achieve your goal. See yourself treating your friends to holidays or a great meal. Make the picture outrageous and colorful to get it well entrenched in your mind. Spirituality is a part of every living human on this planet whether or not you believe in a higher power or a higher purpose. One thing well have is the power to believe in different forms of spirituality which allows us to be free with in our own person.

If you worry that people will laugh at you. Remember it is all in your mind. Nobody will know. In your mind you have everything in the world, so do not worry about it.

High frequency brain wave mp3 recordings can be used to improve your success skills. You can do it wherever you are. So, there any reason not to take advantage of it?

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The Eagle Soars

Do you like to people watch? Have you ever looked up and saw a bird flying through the air and wondered what the view was like from up there? If you could see what would you observe? What is it about people that you like to watch?

Every single person in this world sees the world as they are, not as the world is. This means that when I look at something I see it from a totally different perspective than what you see it from. No wonder there is chaos in the world! The chaos disappears when we look past our differences to see the oneness, when we can see from others point of view it broadens our perspective. This isn't saying one is right and one is wrong, it's saying we are all right, and the picture is so much more beautiful and bigger when we see all angles.

Our perspectives are built by the experiences we have had, by the people who have influenced our lives. In order to see where our perspectives came from we have to look back on our lives and find out who our teachers were, what our experiences have been to form them. In fact in some situations(severe fears and phobias) we have to look back into past lives to see what our experiences were that we carried forward into this life. We may end up finding out that our perspective is not even ours, it is simply something we learned from someone else.

When it comes to finding your true views on a situation simply quiet your mind and ask yourself, "how do I feel about this?'. Then just wait and allow the answers to come from within. You may be amazed at the answers you get. You may even find yourself in conflict with how you would normally react to this. You may find you don't know how to express how it is you feel, or that you fear the reaction from others. It is ok, you are safe, you are learning about your true self. You are feeling your true feelings, and it can feel very different, but trust that it is real. The next step in this process is to trust the answers you get, work towards expressing them by getting comfortable with them and building confidence. Each step you take will build your confidence. In the end it doesn't matter what others think, as long as your express yourself in a loving manner, their opinions are their own. In fact you may find that some people start to fall away out of your life, and this is ok, because new people will be coming in to replace them.

You can begin to be the observer in your life, and see if from the view of a soaring eagle. A good way to start this practice is with music. Start listening to some music, get comfortable, now close your eyes, relax and ask yourself, who is listening to the music? In your mind step back and see who is listening. Be the observe of the listener. This takes a little practice and the more you can relax the better, don't try and force anything to happen. Simply observe. This experiment requires you to be completely in the moment with yourself and the music. It is a very loving peaceful place to be.

Once you can achieve the observer you can take it one step further, you can do it with any situation in fact the more often you stay in this space the closer you are to the true you. Now be the observe again, bu this time imagine you are the eagle soaring high above your life. What do you see? How do you feel? Again, this takes practice, stay out of your mind, out of your thinking and just allow. Keep in mind your eyes may see what your heart wants them to see. You will learn to discern what is real and what your mind is making up, by how you feel within. This is all about trusting, and knowing it is real.

As you practice this technique you are not only learning to stay in the moment, you are also learning to increase your intuition. Start to trust the things you are seeing and experiencing. Start to act on the ones that feel good to you. You may notice changes starting to happen around you, coincidences starting to appear from no where, they are real, be thankful for them and they will continue.

Being that eagle that soars above allows you to see things without the earthly attachments that we have, it allows for a different perspective, it allows your true self to see. This practices opens us up to seeing that there is far more to life than we ever imagined. We are each our own eagle and have the choices to fly the coarse our heart desires. When we stay in this moment, we are flying hand in hand with all there is, Where will you fly? Enjoy the journey!!

I am Jenn Prothero an angel therapy practitioner, reiki practitioner, and crystal healer. I enjoy empowering people to live the life of their dreams, to assist them in letting go of the past and moving forward into a brighter light.

I offer intuitive life coaching, private healing meditation, as well as angel readings, all of my services can be provided either in person or via email or phone.

My new children's book, Fairies Teach Forgiveness is now available for purchase on my website and on Kindle.

Listen live every Tuesday evenings at 8 Pm on Souls Journey Radio for discussions on different techniques.

Please feel free to visit my website for all the services I provide

http://jennprothero.webs.com/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6421806

Have Faith in Your Abilities - Thoughts to Make You Think

If you notice that the people who tend to be successful have something that other people do not have they tend to do things with little effort, but is this the case? What are the things that contribute to achieving success? Is there a system or way of doing things that allows a person to be successful? How can a person find out the way or the system of achieving success? If you look at every person on this planet, we all have skills, and no to people are the same. We all have something that is unique about us something that we do better than everyone else on the planet.

So what are your unique skills and abilities, what are the things that people ask you to do because you are good at it. What do you like doing, and what do you do that people say that you have a gift at. If you look at people who tend to be successful in their field of endeavour, they tend to believe in themselves. They have confidence that they will achieve the things that they set out to achieve. They seem to have inner self belief. These are some of the qualities that makes a person successful, so a key is to learn from people who are already successful. It is good to learn the things that made them successful, and develop those skills in yourself.

Read about successful people and find out what things that they do and develop the same skills and abilities in yourself. You will find that most people who have gone on to be successful were just like everyone else, but what made them different. Could it be that they had faith in their abilities. Could it be that they kept trying until they succeeded. Could it be that they learnt from the things that went wrong in their lives. When people would go to the healer Jesus for healing, he would ask them, do you believe that I can heal you and if they said yes he would say your faith has made you whole. This suggest that your own faith is what allows you to achieve the things that you desire to achieve.

Napoleon Hill studied a large number of self-made millionaires over 20 years and found that the had many things in common, He found one of the things was that they had self-confidence and faith in their abilities. So we can see that it is very important to have faith in your own abilities in order to find success in life. Self-belief is very important a person has to believe that the can achieve the things that they have set out to do. That is one of the important things that can help a person to find success in their endeavors. So have faith in your abilities.

MGA Brown (c) July 2011

http://www.toolsofsuccess.co.uk/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6419726

Top Tips for Teaching One-On-One By Lyn Glendinning

Teaching and coaching one-on-one can be extremely rewarding, both for the teacher and the student. It allows the teacher to be completely focused on the needs of one learner, rather than having to accommodate the different learning needs of a group. Here are some tips for successful one-on-one teaching.

Enthusiasm - Always be enthusiastic and full of energy when you are spending time with a student. Whether your student is an adult or a child, they will respond to your energy and the lesson will go accordingly. Your enthusiasm will allow the student to make mistakes with confidence, so that they can be corrected.

Understanding - Understand the needs of the student you are with. Knowing whether your student is primarily visual, kinesthetic or auditory will allow you to adapt your teaching method and materials to the specific needs of the student. When you are teaching to the primary learning style of your student, they will grasp the material more easily, and you are less likely to have to re-teach the concept the following week.

Creativity - Be creative in the teaching strategies you use. If the student comes to you daily or weekly, creative teaching methods will help to maintain their interest in the subject and your enthusiasm for the class. Your creativity will encourage the student to put forward their own ideas and be creative too.

Organisation - Be organised and prepared for the lesson. At the beginning of the lesson, discuss specific goals and objectives for the lesson, so that both you and your student experience a sense of achievement at the end. Tasks set for the following lesson should reinforce the concepts covered, or pre-assess knowledge of the next topic. When you are organised and clear about your objectives, take home tasks are easier to plan.

Focus - It is vital to remain focused on the task at hand throughout the lesson. If you allow yourself to become distracted, the student will become distracted too. However, don't be afraid to leave the student time to think or plan during the lesson. Your one-on-one time allows a flexible goal schedule, so use it to encourage self-directed learning and assessment.

Feedback - Always provide feedback at the end of the lesson, even if the task is not complete. It always helps if feedback is presented in a positive manner, particularly with children, as it will encourage them to look forward to their next session with you. If they are looking forward to the next session, they will find it easier to get any take home tasks done.

All of the above factors help to create a positive and personal relationship between teacher and student. For those, like me, who make the jump from classroom coaching to one-on-one teaching, this is the best reward of all.

The Insight Institute is a teaching and training organisation, based in Gaborone, Botswana. We are committed to empowering individuals and organisations through our Dynamic Speaking and Communications Strategies programmes, and value the relationships we build with clients. Check out our website - http://www.insight-institute.org - for more information about the Insight Institute.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6407132

Turning Adversity Into A Learning Tool - Thoughts To Make You Think

Adversity is something that can be viewed in different ways depending on each person. It can be seen as one of the most dreadful things that can happen to someone or a prompt which says what are the lessons here for me to learn. I remember it being said that we may have known everything that was going to happen before we came into this life. I have also heard it said that we may have chosen everything that happens in our life so that we can learn things for our spiritual growth. If that be the case then we would not have to worry too much about the things that happen in life because if we did choose these experiences them we would have chosen them for a reason.

Let us imagine for a moment that we were spiritual God like beings, who decided that they wanted to give up their powers for a while and experience the idea of lack and not having for a while. Then this whole earth experience would not be such a problem because of the idea that what is happening is by choice. So this would give a totally new spin on life. This would be a bit like acting in a play and playing various different parts of our own choosing. If this were the case we could choose a life where we had a very poor start in life and struggled to be a great success in later life. Imagine if we today could wear holographic glasses which allowed us to live a complete life in a few seconds, and say we had a suit that had special sensors that allowed us to experience everything in this experience. Indeed this could be a new way to go on holiday, this idea has been seen in some science fictions movie's. So this whole concept could then be used as a learning tool, for example we could experience a history lesson by actually living in the exact experience. So indeed we could choose to experience some adverse conditions and see what we could learn from the condition.

But to take this to another level, imagine the faculty of imagination was so effective and life-like that we could actually live another life in our imagination. Well that could be a very exciting prospect so we could be able to live the life of our dreams without even stepping out of our homes. So what are yours views on this life could we all be perhaps co-authoring each others plays as it has been suggested in "The Secret" Movie's, a film about the working of a Law of Attraction? If you were indeed a God would you have chosen the life that you currently live or would you choose another.

Thoughts to make you think.

MGA Brown © July 2011

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6419470

The Power You Need Is Inside You - Thoughts To Make You Think

The Power Within

The things that we need could be nearer than we think. When we look for external things to bring us satisfaction, it may be found that true satisfaction never comes. Why is this that satisfaction does not seem to come from external things? Could that be because we already have every thing that we need within us?

The eyes of a child

When we look at the life of a growing child, you will notice that the child would get more joy from the wrapping paper than the present. It would seem that the processed gift does not give the joy that was expected. Notice children who are play and are using their imagination, using the toy made out of a few branches of a tree. The imagination does not require the pre-packaged items found in most super toy store.

Great inventors

To take this a step further if we consider the great inventor, you could notice that the great invention started in the mind of the great person. So if you even consider that great inventors like Thomas Edison was able to create countless inventions including the light bulb and the moving picture, you we see that they had great imagination. The powerful fact is we all have the power to create great things, the key is to realise and then take action to achieve our creation. Also we could say that one of the great things that we have is the power of thought. The power to think I feel has been the greatest gift that mankind has been blessed with. When we have an idea and then take action we have the power to bring forth a great gift to mankind. So use your imagination and let it run wild and see all the possibilities that you can bring forth.

The sea of possibilities

So how can we open the trap to this great lake of possibility? Well the first thing I would say is to recognise that you and every one on this planet is unique. We all can do things that no one else on this planet can do. The people who seem to excel could have found out the things that they excel at.

So have faith in your abilities and look for the things that you enjoy and excel at. Always remember you have the power to find the gift that is laying dormant inside of you. So release that gift, and use the power of imagination to make you be the person that you can become.

MGA Brown (c) July 2011

http://www.toolsofsuccess.co.uk/

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6411453

Tips For Teachers Seeking Jobs.

You've worked hard to get through college. You've finished student teaching. You have a great portfolio and you have a lot of ideas about how to be a good teacher. Now how do you get hired? I've hired many teachers in my career as an elementary school principal. Here are some tips I offer to prospective teachers:

Tip Number One: Know what you want. Make a list of what you are looking for in a job and read that list every day. Don't settle for anything less. Read the book The Secret. If you believe it you will achieve it. A couple of times in my life I've been hired for jobs that I was probably under-qualified but when I went into my interview, I exuded self-confidence.

Tip Number Two: Maintain a positive attitude. Make a list of all of your positive attributes related to teaching and read them out loud every day. This will help you with your own self-esteem as well as prepare you for you for your interviews as well as any phone and networking contacts you may come across unexpectedly. Read positive literature. Keep a journal.

Tip Number Three: Plan your day as if you are already working. Follow a daily schedule. Get up in the morning. Work out. Get dressed as if you were going to work. You never know who you will run into that will be a job lead. You want to look your best. Spend at least one hour per day sending out resumes. Work a part-time job or volunteer. Make a list of areas you need to work on as well.

Spend at least two hours per doing relevant reading and research on those areas as well as the following topics:

1.Classroom Management: I haven't seen a new teacher yet who knew enough about how to control large groups of children.

2.Effective, hands-on lessons: Principals are looking for creative teachers who can keep students actively engaged.

3. Helpful, online teacher websites: It is helpful to have at least five bookmarked websites that you can go to for lesson plan ideas in your chosen teaching area. Make a list of areas you need to work on as well.

Tip Number Four: Develop a good cover letter and resume. Superintendents, principals and other district Human Resources staff spend between ten to fifteen seconds perusing your resume to determine if you are worthy of an interview. They look at skills, work experience and college attended. Your resume should be one page because they won't look at the second page. They will also peruse your letters of recommendation so make sure they are attached to your resume. At my website My Special Needs Classroom, I give sample resumes and related items.

Include relevant work experience, especially work experience involving children. The quality that employers seek above all else is a strong worth ethic. They want teachers who are energetic, dependable, team-oriented, and hard-working and set a good example to the community. Job experience with a positive recommendation is the best way to demonstrate you meet these qualifications. Volunteer experience is also helpful, particularly volunteer experience with children who have special needs, who are English Language Learners, are socio-economically disadvantaged or from an urban area.

Tip Number Five: Get at least three positive letters of recommendation. The most important letter of recommendation you should try to get is one from the principal of the school where you student taught. Principals value the opinion of other principals. The others should be from your cooperating teacher for student teaching, a supervisor from a previous job and a college professor. In addition, you can ask for letters of recommendation from field experience supervisors, a clergy member, a volunteer coordinator or a family friend who is prominent in the community. Make sure you have working summer numbers for all of your recommendations. Unlike some professions, your references will be called.

Tip Number Six: Network Tell everyone you meet you are looking for a teaching job. You never know who you will run into who will lead you in the right direction. I was fortunate enough to have the former state superintendent of Ohio, Dr. Franklin B. Walter, as an adjunct professor at Ohio State University when I was getting my Master's Degree. He told us if we really wanted a job to call the Superintendent's office of the district we wished to work for and make a five minute appointment to see that person. He said to go into the superintendent and say, "Hi, my name is Susan Smith and I want to work for you. I am the most qualified person you can find." My point is, it sometimes takes some guts to get what you want.

Tip Number Seven: Ace your interview. Find a list of potential questions. Write them out and practice, even videotaping if possible. Dress professionally in a simple suit and flat heeled shoes. Typical teacher interviews last 15 - 20 minutes and include six to ten questions. Plan accordingly.

Tip Number Eight: Send a thank you note after your interview. I can't tell you how important this is. If you don't get the job, it will keep you in the mind of the administrator interviewing you and when another principal calls him/her your name will be at the forefront of their mind.

When you get that dream job, remember you make a difference every day.

For more information on how to get a teaching job go to Kristin Whiting's website, My Special Needs Classroom, at http://www.myspecialneedsclassroom.com. There she offers valuable tips for those seeking a teaching job, both regular and special education teachers.

Kristin Whiting has over 20 years experience in the field of education, including teaching and administrative experience. She is currently doing what she loves best - teaching. She is a Special Needs Preschool Teacher. She loves to write and in addition to her two blogs, she is a regular contributor to Associated Content, EzineArticles.com, Examinier.com, Squidoo and Hubpages.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6418623

What Prospective Principals Are Looking for in New Teacher Hires

In this article I give specific information to teaching candidates regarding what principals, in particular, are looking for in new hires.

Due to the No Child Left Behind Act, all school principals, whether elementary, middle or high school, are under increasing pressure to create performing schools. They are faced with:

• Competition with charter schools

• Children who bring more and more behavior and social problems to the classroom

• Declining budgets

• Increased pressure from parents, even as parent involvement declines

• Inclusion of, and special accommodations for, children with disabilities

• A marked increase in the importance of standardized test scores

• More job responsibilities, resulting in less time and more stress

• School report cards

• Community image

In addition, high school principals face pressure to increase graduation rates and college admissions, as well as maintain good sports teams and other extracurricular activities.

Principals have, perhaps, the most stressful and demanding job in a school district. They face pressure to please the superintendent, board of education, parents, and teacher's unions, while at the same time maintaining a focus on what is best for children. Naturally, it is impossible for them to please everyone, resulting in job burn-out.

Most people today do not understand the demands a principal faces on a daily basis. The image of a principal that stands out in most people's heads - typically a (man) in a suit sitting behind a big desk in the office talking on the phone, counseling disruptive students, and holding parent conference - is only a very small portion of the principal's career today.

The effective principal today is rarely in the office. He/she maintains visibility throughout the day doing classroom walk-throughs and observations, monitoring common areas such as bus arrival and dismissal, breakfast and lunch, recess, attending committee meetings and working to prevent discipline and other problems from occurring before they start. Middle and high school principals must also attend and monitor after school activities.

In addition, and probably most importantly, principals today must serve as the instructional leader of the building. The principal is expected to analyze test scores, plan and implement intervention strategies, oversee, or in some cases, lead professional development for teachers and oversee grade level and department meetings.

That being said, principals are looking for quality teachers who can assist them in dealing with all these demands from the variety of constituencies. When looking to get a job as a teacher, find ways to highlight the following characteristics and qualifications which will assist the principal in meeting his or her goals.

1. Energetic: An enthusiastic person with a lot of energy to bring to the table; someone who cares about children.

2. A Great Classroom Manager: The ability to manage a classroom full of challenging children with minimal, if any, assistance from the office. Principals want to walk into your classroom and see at least 90% of your students engaged in the lesson or activity.

3. Knowledgeable: The ability to teach lessons consistent with current theories of best practices teaching strategies which will raise standardized test scores. The ability to teach reading to any child regardless of age level and to individualize lesson plans for the unique needs of each learner is a must.

4. A Family Liaison: The ability to work with and win the trust of parents from diverse backgrounds. Principals do not want phone calls from parents unless it's telling them what a good job you are doing. They want parents who will go out in the community and spread the word about what a good teacher you are.

5. Creative: With very little money available for classroom supplies, principals are looking for teachers who are able to maximize the use of the materials they are given and come up with creative ways to get free materials if necessary. Examples include: willingness/knowledge of writing grants, utilizing websites such as Donorschoose.org, and working with Parent-Teacher organizations to do fundraising, making your own classroom materials or finding them free online.

To summarize, you must showcase your talents in a clear and concise manner. When creating a resume, portfolio, or cover letter, focus on showcasing the above five attributes. During your interview, highlight and continually refer back to the above five attributes.

What attributes do you think are important to principals today?

Kristin Whiting is a Special Education teacher and a former principal. She was a building level administrator for 11 years in both rural and urban settings before returning to her first love, teaching children with special needs. For more information on landing a job as a teacher, go her website: My Special Needs Classroom at http://www.myspecialneedsclassroom.com. The website offers specific information on creating a resume, cover letter, thank you note and letters of recommendation, as well as tips on how to get your first job as a teacher.

Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/6405841